We practice for these times, for times like this in the world. We go to our mat, under our shawl, sit on our cushion, to find peace amid the rubble of grief, rage, and fear. We attend to our practice precisely so that when the tides of emotion are strong, so is our practice. We return again and again to our breath, to our body and mind in the moment, returning to ourselves. Our ancestors developed these practices because they knew—they knew that we could be swept off our feet by our emotions, our ability to choose wisely blinded by the redness of rage or the waters of our grief
Posts filed under mindfulness
Awareness: The Path to Emotional Wellbeing for Kids
Awareness helps us understand and neutralize situations, allowing them to feel less personal. Unconscious patterns like bullying, judgment, and anger become conscious as our awareness grows. As the saying goes, “hurt people hurt people.” When awareness grows, and we become conscious of our emotions, we are more able to transcend behaviors that cause us (or others) to be hurt
A Lesson From an Unfortunate Groundhog
Whenever I see one of my friends, he always mentions Michigan’s roads. His impression of Michigan is that it is a land of bad roads with many dead animals on the side. I also had a bad first impression of Michigan roads. The sight of dead animals on the roadside was very pitiful after I started to drive not long ago.
Vaccine Visions
It was 5 a.m., and I had not yet slept in any meaningful way. I spent the night drifting in and out of wakefulness, my body feeling like it had lost the ability to regulate my temperature: I was simultaneously hot while also experiencing chills. I was on the edges of a migraine, the arm where I had received my second Covid vaccine was too tender to lie on, and periodically nausea washed through me.
Embracing Uncertainty
We have all experienced how the work environment has changed over the last fourteen plus months. Things that would have taken us 5 to 10 years to set in motion have accelerated, virtually overnight. Our ability to connect with others all over the globe has been transformed with the click of a single button. The ability to make a living through technology has made more progress in these last few years than the last 100. Our world has changed in the blink of an eye.
Being OK with Not Being OK – Medusa Redefined
Earlier I described a process whereby parts of us stay behind and argued that our psychological wellbeing requires all parts of the psyche to be anchored within the home-body. That was a call to reunite our many parts in service of living in the best and fullest way possible, which can only happen in the present. I want to repeat Rilke’s words that the point (of life) is to live everything, and build on this idea by inviting contemplation on how to navigate our negative emotions, which are the hardest to feel.
Importance of Honoring
We honor ourselves by honoring not only the past, but the present, and the future as well. Honoring the past includes people, places, phases of life, and memorable events. Honoring the present includes the good, the bad, and the ugly. And we honor the future through making space for our hopes, dreams, and wants.
Societies throughout history and across cultures have grasped the importance of honoring through the creation of an innumerable variety of ceremonies that facilitate it. Let’s contemplate the concept of honoring further.
When Parts of Us Stay Behind
An interesting thing happened to me when I returned from a long awaited and wonderful summer vacation back home. I didn’t even recognize what was going on until after some time passed and I noticed I wasn’t quite myself, I needed more time than usual to adjust to my everyday life; it was as if I wasn’t all here.
Say Something Nice
Overall, I am a better therapist than I am a mother. My love for my children is unquestionably larger/deeper then my care for my clients, and yet when it comes to communicating it, I do a better job as a therapist. Being a therapist is by far less messy then being a parent, and also quite a bit less vulnerable. My ego functions are often triggered as a parent, whereas I can easily keep them out of the picture in my role as counselor. I so cherish the concept of good enough parenting. That, I can do.
Shapeshifting
What resides in our unconscious is as much a part of who we are, and how we behave, as what makes up our consciousness. The language of the unconscious is imagery. The rules by which it functions are mythical. Science seems to lag behind the arts in its grasp of the paradoxes inherent to humanity. The psyche expresses itself through symbol and metaphor that can best be understood through stories, as stories allow for the unknown. Stories tolerate mystery.
Corona Retreat
Solitary retreats are a familiar experience for me. I’ve been taking off into the woods to retreat all of my adult life. After I had cancer ten years ago, I scheduled these retreats as many as six times per year to support my healing process. Retreating alone has been an important piece of my self-care and a way to deepen into my meditation practice.
Self-love
It’s only mid-March and I’ve already noticed a shift in my outlook that has influenced how 2020 is going for me. I’m not sure what started it: An invitation by my art teacher Flora Aube to ditch typical new year resolutions in favor of self –love? An artwork with a message to replace acceptance with the ongoing efforts to become a better version of myself? Or simply, turning 50? The recognition of having lived half a century leads one to contemplate certain things.
Women with Trees on Their Mind
I didn’t always love trees, not like I love people and animals. It takes a certain amount of deepening, maturity, and patience to appreciate the subtle, to grasp interconnectedness in its totality.
How To Clean Out Your Closet: What To Ditch And What To Keep
Minimalism has increasingly gained in popularity. When you choose minimalism, there is no space to contain disorder, especially in the closet. The modern-minimal-chic advocate curating every small detail of your life, down to the laundry drawer. Marie Kondo, author of The Magical Art of Tidying Up, promotes the idea that we should only hold on to things that "make us happy".
Heart Power
How is your heart today? Are you taking good care of your hard-working, delicate organ? It is definitely doing its best to take good care of you. Let’s give a little love back to the heart with some techniques that balance the anahata (sanskrit for “heart”) chakra.
Human-Centered Intentional Culture
Creating a healthy business culture with engaged employees is possible. Clarity of purpose, real care for the people involved, clear expectations and persistence can get you there. The bad news: it is hard. But the good news is that work is much more fun when approached this way.
Habituation vs. Gratitude
I’ve always resonated with the idea of the psyche as landscape that varies in topography, weather patterns, vegetation, and inhabitants. Polarities of all kinds can be found within, even though the mind itself prefers to land on one side of things rather then continuing to remain open to alternatives. It is best to make a practice of contemplating opposing ideas to stay connected to reality, and to not be fooled by our own minds.
Visiting Da Vinci
Recently I had the privilege of revisiting Paris after 25 years since my study abroad in college. I had no concept of mindfulness back then and wasn’t nearly as contemplative. My memory space stored places and events that were meaningful to me regardless, allowing me to see how they differed from present experiences.
We got a special magical moment with my husband that did justice to the city’s reputation for romance. The first time we had the chance to stroll by the Seine on our own we stopped by a street musician. We decided to not rush by, but stop and give him our full attention while savoring the blessing of being in Paris together.
Only A Glimpse
I am a summer person living in Michigan, walking around half heartbroken, not being able to keep myself from anticipating what is to come, which is not-summer for another three seasons. Since I know the value of mindful presence, I look for things that’ll help me stay in the present. Even though I am more of a mammal lover in general, at the moment the antidote to my mind’s tendency to hijack me to the future comes from the insect kingdom as they remind me to be in the present, to savor the magic of the moment, and to contemplate the mysteries. I had written a blog about fireflies before so will focus on the butterfly this time around.
The Song of the Phoenix
I realized only later that I had great expectations around how wonderful it would all be in a way that wasn’t compatible with real life. I try to help my clients understand the many myths around mindfulness practices, especially the one that suggests that regular practice will lead to steady calm, happiness, or bliss. What mindfulness cultivates is an increased capacity to be present with all states of being rather then favoring the good over the bad and the ugly. One of the biggest takeaways of the retreat for me personally was that the same applies to retreats or vacations.
