Pregnancy and childbirth is a time of immense transformation. For some women it is the most beautiful day of their lives, but for so many more, the process of giving birth is a traumatic memory marked by surgery, violation, and a loss of control. In an act of conscious rebellion against this standard, women are choosing to look to the past and choose to birth the way we were always intended to: unmonitored, unmolested, and free. One such woman I talked to, “Dana,” describes her birth as being, “incredibly straightforward without any drama.”
Posts filed under Parenting
Conscious Parenting: Navigating Negative Thought Flow
“I don’t really like myself,” my teen blurted out in the middle of a seemingly mundane conversation we were having last week. He tightened his lips to hold back emotion. I paused, as I noticed my jaws clench. Surprised by what he declared, I felt my eyes stinging as salty tears began to trickle into my eyes. My heart felt heavy, longing to simply scoop him up into my lap like I did when he was young, soothing him with kisses on his soft forehead.
Reilly Campbell: Sovereign Birth Worker
In October, I sat down with my good friend Reilly Campbell for a discussion about birth, life, Ann Arbor, and everything in between. An Austin, Texas transplant, Campbell can best be described as a ray of sunshine. Though only 25, she is wise far beyond her years and serves as an inspiration to anyone looking to walk with women on the path from maiden to mother and beyond.
Kids in the community: Winter Boredum Busters
When the chill of winter sets in and the days grow shorter, it's easy for kids to feel stuck indoors with nothing to do. But winter doesn't have to be boring! From exploring local spots and discovering wildlife in its winter habitat to cozying up with a good book, trying out hands-on crafts, or creating a snow-themed masterpiece at home, there's plenty to keep young minds busy and curious all season long. All it takes is a little creativity to make this frosty time of year fly by.
Conscious Parenting: Prepping for Baby: Find the Right Doula for You
Imagine knowing all the things, having a supportive partner, and knowing that you don’t have to remember everything. Imagine knowing that someone else has eyes out for your best interests without worrying about ulterior motives. Imagine that someone is watching out for your partner as well! It can feel like such a load off your shoulders to know that there is someone there who is familiar with the process.
The Symphony of Development: Exploring the Importance of Music in a Baby’s Growth
In the delicate journey of a baby’s life, music weaves a melody that resonates far beyond the nursery walls. The impact of music on a baby’s development encompasses cognitive, emotional, social, and physical domains. Incorporating music into a baby’s early experiences is not just a source of joy but a powerful catalyst for holistic development.
Babywearing 101: A Crash Course in Safety, Comfort, and Ease
The world is constantly being blessed with the arrival of new little ones, and statistically speaking, you have or will become the parent, grandparent, aunt, or uncle of a brand-new baby. Emerging into a world full of new sights, sounds, and sensations, many babies feel overwhelmed by the number of stimuli they are exposed to and never want to leave their caretaker’s side. Congratulations. This is a perfectly normal baby! Human beings are classified as carry mammals, much like monkeys, and we are designed to have our babies close to us at all times—hence the velcro baby situation many caretakers find themselves in. Unlike monkeys however, our babies do not emerge from the womb with the necessary skills to effortlessly hang onto us, leading many to be confused as to what to do with a baby that never wants to be put down.
Leaps of Faith: Empowered Bumps and Boobs
It’s okay. Go ahead and laugh at her company’s name. Emily Stone would be flattered. And to emphasize the play on meaning behind Empowered Bumps and Boobs, she would probably even hand you her favorite promotional product—a pen with a squishy breast at the top of it.
Motherhood as a ReVillaging Rite of Passage
Almost four years into my personal journey into motherhood, I have learned that some of my challenges are wildly common. Near-constant sensory and logistical overwhelm, deconstructing of (well-intended) pre-baby idealism, hard-to-communicate grief and resentments, and the occasional dose of blinding hot rage or anxiety. My journey has also been, however, a powerful invitation to a rite of passage through and beyond what author Beth Berry calls “Motherwhelm.”
Kids Can Cook, Too! And Why They Should…
Cooking isn’t just about whipping up tasty treats (although that’s definitely a big part of the fun). Empowering and nurturing children’s culinary skills extends far beyond the kitchen. It’s a fantastic adventure where kids explore, create, and learn skills that will stick with them for life. Think of it as a mix of delicious experiments and add a sprinkle of essential life lessons on top. From crafting scrumptious snacks to understanding the fuel that keeps us going, kids learn the importance of nutrition, gain confidence, and feel accomplished. In today’s fast-paced world, introducing kids to the wonders of cooking is an invaluable gift, offering them a foundation for a lifetime of healthy eating habits and a deeper appreciation for the culinary arts.
Conscious Parenting: Harnessing the Power of Talking Out Loud — The Teddy Bear and the Talker
Imagine your child is trying to figure something out, like what to do for the summer. As your child talks to you, what kinds of questions do you feel drawn to ask? Do the questions have more to do with supporting your child in exploring the parts of the conversation your child wants to explore, or more to do with your own concerns? What could enable your child to get the benefit of having plenty of room to talk out loud and to take the conversation wherever your child wants to go with it?
The Current State of Sexual Health Education in Michigan
It wasn’t until later that I learned that my experience with sexual health education was not uncommon. I assumed, as a kid whose whole world was based around school, that everything in the curriculum was what was required to be successful in life. At the time, I didn’t realize how career-driven it was: Math, Science, English, and History were the four main subjects. Nothing about growing your own food, repairing clothes, doing your taxes, paying a mortgage, how to have fulfilling relationships, how to maintain good mental health practice, and more.
Book Review: I'll Show Myself Out by Jessi Klein
In a world awash with bad news and the relentless cascade of life’s endless absurdities, Jessi Klein emerges as a comedic voice of reason, a beacon of humor and humanity amidst the chaos. Her eagerly anticipated second essay collection, I’ll Show Myself Out: Essays on Midlife & Motherhood takes readers on a riotous journey through the tangled web of motherhood, midlife, and the quirkiness of modern existence.
Quietly Noticing
I stood about twenty feet away from my two-year-old waiting to push her on a swing or do a count down while she hyped herself up to glide down a slide. I had just gotten done with a three-mile run with her in a stroller at the loop at Hudson Mills. The only way we get through these runs is a lot of snacks and the promise of playground time, and I was ready for the playground time. To me, playground time is a time that I don’t have to keep my brain on high alert. Rinoa would play and I would catch my breath and not have to figure out how to run, push, grab, and unwrap a snack all at once as I had been doing for thirty minutes prior.
Screen Time Solutions
As an elementary school teacher for almost three decades, I’ve witnessed a dramatic shift in recent years in the behavior and habits of children. Further, I’ve seen an alarming rise in obesity and violent tendencies during that time. I attribute these changes, in part, to excessive screen time as well as a lack of parental involvement.
Elements Preschool
I discovered Elements Preschool a few months ago during my extended early childhood education studies. To my delight, it is not only a place of discovery for children, but also for adults. Soon after being introduced to Elements Preschool, I started working with Kirsten Voiles, the founder and director, with whom I share a passion for education and the arts.
Conscious Parenting: Ele's Place Ann Arbor--A Home for Healing Arts
Ele’s Place Ann Arbor is a healing center that provides peer grief support for children, teens, and their families in Ann Arbor as well as the surrounding southeast Michigan area, free of charge, for as long as a family needs. Ele's Place Ann Arbor is the only nonprofit in our community dedicated solely to helping children and teens work with, and through, grief in a peer-based setting.
Random Acts of Kindness: The Things Women Still Can’t Talk About And Why We Sometimes Have to Invite Ourselves In
I am fortunate to live on a street that’s close to downtown, where I can sit on my front porch and, for three seasons of the year, anyway, I can hail all my neighbors as they pass by. I can get to know their names and their dogs’ names, too. I see the same pairs of women walking or running together and talking.
Conscious Parenting: Meditation For Breakfast
I’m really good at anger; I always have been. The fight response in my threat system is ready to launch. If I wanted to slip back into my old baseline of anger in that moment, I had plenty of reasons to: I was in a rush, I was hungry, I was feeling unappreciated for the things I didn’t forget to do for my sons, I was feeling vulnerable at my son’s implication that my best wasn’t enough, and I was feeling blamed for “ruining” my son’s morning routine.
Conscious Parenting: Five Lessons From My Two-Year-Old
Katy Gladwin
This year I have had the pleasure of spending every single waking and sleeping moment with my two-year-old. While I love her very much, I also had a very hard time, until recently, finding a daycare we connected with that had availability. Spending this absurd amount of time with a toddler has made me a little less sane but has also taught me some very valuable lessons. These are lessons I hope to include in my daily life and will do my best to not force her to outgrow.
Party Every Day
Why not?! We had a lovely bonfire gathering with friends this summer, and it was so fun for her that she asked for a party every day after that. I tried to figure out ways we could “party” every day, because having that fun connection with friends and family was so great. Sometimes that looked like a playground trip or a walk in the woods with her little buddies, while other times it was a smaller family dance party, or a singing party in the car. I think it’s important to point out the moments when we’re having a party—also known as finding the joy in the mundane.
I try to remember this when I’m doing chores or just putzing along doing the everyday work of motherhood/adulthood. Take a moment, find something to make a boring task more fun. Put on a song, laugh with friends, find something to feel energetically joyful about.
Slow Down
While this might seem like the opposite of a party every day, it is really important for toddlers to feel like they can watch and learn without being rushed. So, this might mean I need to let her take ten minutes to figure out how to put her socks on or sit with her on the sidewalk while she watches a bug go by. I notice myself feeling like I need to speed things up, all the time, and she reminds me to sit, and watch, and listen. To be still for a few minutes, even if it’s just for noticing my breath—in and out.
Stop Eating When You’re Full
My daughter is so good at this! I know it’s super common to tell kids to “just eat three more bites,” and sometimes it’s necessary—especially if you have a busy, wandering kind of kiddo. But if you’re able to tap into what’s going on in their bodies, and trust that they know, then you can often allow them to guide. When she’s satiated, she stops eating! Even if the food is her favorite—cookies, sweet potato fries, mac and cheese. As a professional health coach, I meet so many women who don't know how to tell if their bodies are full. For whatever reason, many of us have disconnected from the signals our bodies tell us around food and satiety. We often don’t need to finish all the food on our plate—our eyes are bigger than our stomach kind of thing. Little humans know when to stop eating, and as long as we continue to listen, and trust them, they should be able to keep hearing their bodies little voices throughout childhood and into adulthood.
Take a Hug
She says, “I take a hug?” And “take” is exactly what she means! “This hug is for me.” I love when she takes a hug. We need physical touch from our people—our physiology changes when we receive hugs and loving touch from others. Our oxytocin (the love and bonding hormone) levels rise and our nervous system can relax into safety. It also allows me to know what she needs, she asks and receives, and I can easily provide her with that feeling of certain safety. We’re terrible at asking for our needs to be met, and physical touch is a biological need. Take a hug! Your nervous system and your relationships will thank you.
First, Say “no”—Then Change Your Mind If You Want
We all know a two-year-old’s favorite word is no. This used to annoy me, but now I love how she just has boundaries! She says no, but then always has the option to change her mind. This is so hard to learn, especially if you have caregiver syndrome. We have all heard the saying “No is a complete sentence” and I think we should all be taking this more to heart. Similar to the idea of ‘under promise and over perform,’ standing in our integrity and confident in our boundaries is a lesson we should all take to heart. Sometimes our boundaries are hard to find in the moment or under pressure—so saying no first can allow time to find where our true needs and desires meet expectations.
Katy Gladwin CHC, WHC, as a Holistic Doula and health guide has been supporting women in body autonomy and sovereignty through the childbearing years for over a decade. Through private and group programs, she teaches, guides, listens, and carries sacred healing in whatever form each women finds they need most. Gladwin is trained as a coach though an Integrative Medicine Lens and has studied naturopathic medicine and modalities including homeopathy, herbal wisdom, craniosacral therapy, HeartMath(R), breath work, and holistic nutrition.
To contact her, email katy@katygladwin.com or visit her online
at katygladwin.com.
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