By Jennifer Evans
“What then is freedom? The power to live as one wishes.”
I was wearing a walking cast on my broken right foot toward the end of my tenure as an administrative assistant at the University of Michigan Ross School of Business. At work one day, when I knew I was tendering my resignation but had not yet announced it, I was clunking into our “hub” from my office down the hall. The hub was a room that had multiple functions: mail room, kitchen, copy room, and a place where people touched base, shared a greeting, or had a chat. On this day one of my co-workers walked in at the same time as I and greeted me with, “How long do you have?”
I didn’t understand. What’s he talking about? Could it be? Oh no! All I could think he meant, because it was at the forefront of my heart and mind, was, “How long do you have ‘til you quit this job?” Not understanding how he could know, but knowing what it meant to me, I worried. I scrambled to come up with a reply.
I looked at him quizzically, because there was no reason he would have any idea of how strongly I was leaning toward moving on from my position. I was silent, surely looking confused, and he asked again, “How long ‘til you’re free?”
Again, I thought, what?! And then, yes!
It was exactly how I felt! How long until I am free?
Then I wondered if he’d gotten a hint from a new definition I’d taped on my door which was: Eleutheromania (n.) an intense and irresistible desire for freedom. This taping up of eye-catching things was a ritual I practiced normally, so not unusual, but was this particular one a too obviously personal window into my emotional world? Was it that to which he referred? While the word did express my feeling, I really couldn’t imagine that he’d make the leap to my emotional state. Stumped and in a bit of a panic, I continued looking at him with confusion. He then nodded in the direction of the boot on my foot.
Obviously. Obviously, what he meant. How long do you have? How long ‘til you’re free? My body flooded with relief as my understanding caught up with his meaning. Free from the hindering cast! Finally, I answered his simple question and laughed myself back to my office.
And then, I knew even more than I’d known before. What it meant to me to be free. Not just freedom to walk freely. But free to be truly me.
Things you might want to consider:
Where do you feel restrained?
What step could you take to move toward freedom?
What first occurred to you that you perhaps quickly shunted to the side?
That is a likely and possible step—if it weren’t, you wouldn’t have thought of it.
If it is too much, do a small something toward it—at least you’ll be moving in some direction.
Jennifer Evans is a positive deviant by nature. She shares her discoveries through workshops and writings. Learn more at positivedeviancelab.com
Related content:
In shamanism, ancestors are a source of great personal power and support that one may call upon to enrich one’s growth, to gain wisdom, and to manifest one’s highest good.