Unschooling — Child-Led-Learning

By Tammy Renner

Unschooling is a term coined in the 1970s by John Holt whose books Learning All the Time and Teach Your Own (among others), have empowered parents for decades to homeschool their children in a liberating way. Rethinking the definition of education, schooling “outside the box,” is as unique as every parent and child. It is apparent to those who observe young children that learning does indeed happen in every moment, thus children are naturally their own best teachers. Unschoolers see the community as their school. Children learn with parents, neighbors, family, friends, librarians, educators, community members, books, media, backyards, parks, museums, and through unique opportunities to travel. With freedom and choice about learning, the children are happy, and equally important, so are the adults. 

While some might think that Unschooling is “children running around the house and neighborhood wild all day,” it seldom is. Rather, it is a gift of being—allowing children to be purely themselves, learning in their own time, in ways that bring more joy and success. More recently, unschooling has been called Child-Led-Learning where each child is given the time and opportunity to learn at their own pace, going as fast or slow as they need and/or desire. Some children will learn to read at the age of three, others not until around age ten, yet when they do read, Unschoolers delight in doing so and are often seen carrying several books at a time for their reading delight. A child might read voraciously yet struggle to spell on their own. Spelling and grammar eventually catch up with their reading, when the child’s mind is ready to learn. Forcing spelling and grammar seldom has positive effects and may have the opposite . When the Unschooler is uncomfortable and/or resists a topic, a parent may worry and feel they must persist in educating their child, so they are “at grade level,” fit into society, and meet the family standards. Unschooling parent Katrina Gutleben emphasizes this by wisely saying: "Learning can only happen when a child is interested. If he's not interested, it's like throwing marshmallows at his head and calling it eating ."

Many Unschoolers find that math is gratifying when taught through daily life skills that the child will use far beyond the family home. Cooking provides opportunities to measure and count, creating schedules teaches how to tell time and divide it into various activities, making projects, regardless of the medium, teach additional measuring skills and the wisdom to “measure twice, cut once.” Shopping and creating a budget for household items and those on a child/family wish list begin the teaching of economics. Some Unschoolers create businesses, selling something they’ve created with their own hands, written, grown, or collected. Others offer services such as gardening and snow shoveling or intern several hours a week with a local small business person learning alongside as many did in the days of apprenticeships.

What about the middle and high school-age student? Three main scenarios are often seen: 1. The Unschooled child desires to attend a school. They spend a few months to a year preparing, motivated to put time into subjects they may not have intrinsically found interesting or were too challenging in prior years. The motivated teen will in most cases quickly brush up on spelling, grammar, math and/or science skills as required by the school in order to attend and take classes at the level of interest. If extra help is needed with this preparation, a tutor can be engaged. 2. The schooled child may need a respite from school and begin Unschooling in the teen years. Unschooling books and websites for teens and their parent(s) specifically talk about how to rectify learning and or personal difficulties experienced by taking a learning sabbatical and the easing into home/community learning. 3. The Unschooled child craves something new and different, yet does not want to attend school in the traditional manner. The solution can be as simple as finding a mentor, tutor, or online/ in person class(es). The teen may create an apprenticeship in their specific area of interest. Some teens create a living situation with family friends or relatives in a different location in order to experience both a different family/cultural structure and study a specialty that is available only in the vicinity of the new living arrangement.

Whether Unschooled or schooled, there are times extra support for a child’s physical health, mental health, and/or educational interventions will transform the dark clouds and stigma that surround these situations into one of empowerment and healing. Unschoolers are wise in knowing “it takes a village to raise a child.” The Michigan Alliance for Families provides information, support, and education for parents of children with a wide range of specific needs and is available to parents of children schooled and homeschooled. Particular learning needs with a physical aspect are often supported by insurance and Medicaid. Michigan’s public schools offer a wide range of assessments and offerings to homeschooled families (this has increased significantly since 2020). The Clonlara School, whose home is in Ann Arbor, offers support and mentoring to Unschooling families and has been a huge contributor lobbying for the legal rights of homeschoolers (clonlara.org).

If you think homeschooling would be torturous but your child is incredibly unhappy in their current situation, then you might choose Unschooling. With a bit of imagination and research, you can create a wonderful Unschooling learning environment for your child without being the main educator.

For parents who want to unschool their child(ren) yet are concerned about communications and don’t want to continue arguing about learning, know many of these challenges often lessen as the stress of traditional schooling dissipates. Many Unschooling parents keep the NYTimes’s best sellers oldies but goodies How to Talk So Kids/Teens Will Listen and So Kids/Teens Will Talk along with How to Talk So Kids Can Learn by Faber & Mazlish on their table as an ongoing communication resource. 

 If you are considering Unschooling: 

Give Unschooling a try during the summer, a weekend, a holiday break, or in urgent cases take a bit of time off from school to give it a go.

Connect with Unschooling groups/families, if you don’t know any Unschoolers, consider a local Facebook group: facebook.com/HomeschoolersAnnArbor/.

Read about Unschooling and Child-Led-Learning starting with the Growing without Schooling website: johnholtgws.com/growing-without-schooling-issue-archive.

Gather local resources, groups, and people to support you as you get started

Allow time for you as a parent to have time alone inside and outside the house – if necessary, hire childcare or barter to get this time, it is essential self-care.

Two parent families pre-schedule regular dates in and out of the house – also essential self-care.

Know your state’s requirements for homeschooling (Note: Michigan is a low homeschool regulations statehslda.org/legal.)

Delight in your choice, find joy in the little things–including distractions–these are often the best Unschooled moments.

“Trust Children. Nothing could be more simple—or more difficult. Difficult, because to trust children we must trust ourselves—and most of us were taught as children that we could not be trusted,” wrote John Holt in Teach Your Own.

Tammy Renner teaches piano lessons, leads BrainBodyBalance classes, is a homeschooling consultant, and enjoys colorful creativity as textile artist and gardener. Her two adult (mostly Unschooled) daughters are beginning their careers as a Clinical Social Worker and an Educational Psychology Researcher. Visit Renner online at https://tammyrenner.wixsite.com/tammyrenner/home.

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